Monday, January 18, 2010


The e-mail came.
My heart sank.
She didn't choose us.
She chose the other family.

Tonight, while one family rejoices, I sit here numb. I just wish I could cry. But I have no tears. There are no words to describe how I feel. No words but numb. I don't understand, yet I do. I wish it was us, but it isn't. I'm so happy for the other family, yet I hurt for mine. The worst was having to give the news to my husband. I hate that! I almost cried then. I saw the hurt on his face. The disappointment. For one second, I wished I could lie.

I don't know what else to say. I'm numb, and I just want to cry, but I can't. Please help God!

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18


  1. Vanessa,
    I'm so sorry. Hope you can make it to Moms group in the morning so I can give you a big hug. I'll be praying for you and Chris.


  2. Thank you Melissa. Angie I plan on being there. I just hope I don't disolve into tears when you give me that big hug! :)


Have something on your heart? Share it here.